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  • Step 2 Homework Guide: Home Blueprint

HOME LOVE DESIGN BLUEPRINT:

So now you’ve completed your own personal LOVE + LIFE Blueprint® as well as that of your desired partner.  Next, it’s time for one of the most important and influential elements of your life – your home!  Did you know that your home, the colors you surround yourself with, the furniture you’ve selected, the photos and art displayed on your walls, the materials and textures around you, the contents of your refrigerator, your bathroom drawers, and your bedroom closet are all either attracting or repelling love in your life?  Your choices in all of these facets of your home reveal everything about you and how you feel about yourself, ranging from your level of true happiness and healthy self-love to feelings of depression, detachment, or scatteredness.  Therefore, not only is this portion of your LOVE HOUSE® build fun, but it will also be one of the most life-changing experiences you’ll undergo.  Whether you live in a single room or a palatial mansion has nothing to do with the truth behind what genuinely attracts the love you desire. 

Fill out each section of your home blueprint with thoroughness, care, and honesty.  Notice if areas of your home you once ignored or took for granted are telling you that they need something fresh or more fitting to your personality and life goals.  Are there empty walls or spaces that could use a splash of vibrant or calming color?  When was the last time you had a bouquet of fresh flowers placed in your living room, by your bedside, or in your kitchen?  When was the last time you truly noticed the comfort of your sheets?  When was the last time you thoroughly cleaned your house?  What about cleaning your refrigerator?  In fact, what’s even in your refrigerator?  Do your dishes and silverware bring you any level of joy?  Do you absolutely love the furniture you have, regardless of where it is placed, or is it just sitting there taking up space or in the wrong space?  These and many other areas of your home all hold a key to the story of who you are, how well you truly love yourself, and what you believe you deserve when it comes to love.  It’s time to get your house in order! 

As you implement these changes in your home, observe as your life begins to shift.  Take before and after photos of each space and area of change in your home to document this incredible transformation.  Post liberally across social media (@mylovedesignofficial)! 

  • Step 2 Homework Guide: Your Mate’s Love + Life Blueprint

YOUR MATE’S LOVE + LIFE BLUEPRINT: 

Congratulations!  You have just completed your personal LOVE + LIFE Blueprint®, and you have discovered a lot about yourself, especially when it comes to how you love and have allowed love in until now.  On a whole new level, you have learned who you are, what you need, what you deserve, why the love you desire may have eluded you, and what you get to do to fulfill and build your beautiful LOVE HOUSE®.  Now you are ready for incredible love to move in!  Whether you are married, coupled, or single, completing your LOVE HOUSE® build has supported you in shifting many aspects of your life that had held you back, thus empowering you to be a better partner to your present or future Mate. 

With this newfound awareness, it’s now time to create Your Mate’s LOVE + LIFE Blueprint®.  If you are single, you will be creating this blueprint based on all that you’ve learned with regard to love and what you desire in your future partner.  If you are coupled or married, each of you will have just completed your own individual blueprints and will now be creating your Mate blueprints together based upon your newly acquired wisdom and awareness.  In many ways, this is very similar to creating a vision board (a collage of cutout images of your favorite aspirations and inspirations in all areas of life that bring you joy).  When it comes to filling in each portion of Your Mate’s LOVE + LIFE Blueprint® (no, you will not be doing their homework for them!), write what you see or visualize as well as what you wish for in a life partner, and later show your Mate blueprints to each other.  Sharing your results with each other will reveal how each of you wishes to experience your lives, goals, and values together.  

This is meant to be fun but can get quite deep.  Regardless, it is meant to sharpen your vision as to what kind of Mate you are as well as want, need, and deserve. 

If coupled or married, this homework assignment is ultimately meant to bring you and your partner closer together with compassion and newfound awareness.  However, if you find that completing this homework has actually triggered something within you that may need continued healing, then it’s time for you to read out loud and discuss each of the 17 categories of the individual LOVE + LIFE Blueprints® together, bringing each of you back to a place that is filled with empathy, awareness, and love. 

  • Step 2 Homework Guide: Your Love + Life Blueprint

Intro

Natural Wisdom

Health & Wellness

Mind Health

Ego Health

Spirit Health

Self-Control

Body/Fitness

Financial Wellness

Work (Calling)

Self-Truth

Love (Self)

Peace

Beauty

Clothing, Appearance and Style

Face & Skincare

Hair

Teeth

YOUR LOVE + LIFE BLUEPRINT: Intro

Now that you’ve taken the Real Reveal® Test and discovered the type of Mate you are (Ego, Life, Soul), revealing to yourself, who you are (or may have been), when it comes to love, how you’ve shown up in love and each of your relationships, along what you’ve been looking for in a relationship – all while learning what your true spiritual gifts are – you now get to design the blueprint for your LOVE HOUSE, that is about to change your entire love life!

Each extraordinary blueprint is a springboard, launching you into the life and relationship God has for you, creating a beautiful space for thought, peace, truth, healing, protection, safety, and growth, most importantly, in your relationship with Jesus!

Matthew 7:24-27 tells us, “Anyone who listens to my teaching and follows it is wise, like a person who builds a house on solid rock. Though the rain comes in torrents and the floodwaters rise and the winds beat against the house, it won’t collapse, because it is built on bedrock. But anyone who hears my teaching and doesn’t obey it is foolish, like a person who builds a house on sand. When the rains and floods come and the winds beat against your house, it will collapse with a mighty crash.”

At this point, know that everything you say and do, as well as everything around you, is either rooted in love and truth, or the flesh, thus making the framework created by building your LOVE HOUSE™ based on God’s principles and truth, absolutely essential! These blueprints capture your Christ-centered vision and your intention, and help guide you on your way toward being love in this world!

Take your time, as you fill out and complete each blueprint on the following pages.

Let’s keep building!

Note: Each week, we will walk through and discuss the following Blueprints, along with your Blueprint Homework and Love Lessons; using the personal items you’ve brought, along with the experiences had, as you complete each days homework.

Natural Wisdom

“For it is written: I will dismantle the wisdom of the wise and I will invalidate the intelligence of the scholars. So where is the wise philosopher who understands? Where is the expert scholar who comprehends? And where is the skilled debater of our time who could win a debate with God? Hasn’t God demonstrated that the wisdom of this world system is utter foolishness?”

1 Corinthians 1:18 (TPT)

The wisdom of God holds profound significance for our relationships, offering a timeless guide for navigating the complexities of human connections.

Rooted in principles of love, forgiveness, and compassion, this divine wisdom encourages us to approach relationships with humility, understanding, and patience. It also provides a moral compass, shaping our decisions and actions in a way that promotes harmony, trust, and mutual respect. Ultimately, the wisdom of God serves as a steadfast foundation to our relationships, fostering healthy connection characterized by godly values, Christ’s love, and a pursuit of biblical wisdom.

The key passage above highlights the contrast between the wisdom of the world and the wisdom of God. The message of the cross is considered foolishness by those who do not believe in the Lord! In this passage, Paul is emphasizing that God’s wisdom often contradicts the wisdom valued by the world, and what may seem foolish to the world is, in fact, the power of God it’s self for believers. Let’s take a deeper dive into wisdom – a key building block to the foundation of our LOVE HOUSE®!

  • Sit with yourself for a moment in a space that is still and quite. Notice if you can hear Gods voice speaking to you about a current circumstance. Take note of if you hear a voice that speaks to you from scarcity, anger, and shame or from warmth, love, and convicting direction.
  • Check what you hear. Not every thought or feeling is from the Lord, some are meant to be held captive and rebuked. Remember, that the voice of God will never contradict the Word of God. Remember that His wisdom convicts and does not condemn.
  • Obtain guidance on what you are hearing from God from wise counsel. How do you know if someone is truly wise counsel? They are – God fearing, scripture based, Spirit filled, Christians. They can help you discern how you are hearing the voice of God.
  • Seek accountability to continually hear out and discern what wisdom the Lord is speaking to you. And remember…He is quick to give it to those who seek fervently!

Your wisdom, really that which speaks straight-up truth to you, is actually that of the word of God, through the Holy Spirit and He knows you and has the ability to awaken you and protect you better than anyone or anything else ever could – if you let Him. When you hear and truly listen to His voice, it is the beginning of learning how to fully love and value yourself as God loves you. It is when you ignore that voice that you get into trouble and repeat patterns that keep you stuck and unhappy. Because at times it can feel as if you have a multitude of voices that echo through your head, it is important to discern the voice of His wisdom through The Holy Spirit, from that, which comes from the lies of the enemy, such as lack, fear, unhealthy ego, or possibly even unhealed childhood wounds.

Now it’s time to get really honest with yourself when it comes to how closely you listen to, trust, and follow the Holy Spirit and the daily wisdom He speaks to you. If this has been an area of struggle for you, that’s okay, for through Him there is grace, love, and renewal and the opportunity to listen to His voice, starting now.

Sit with yourself for a moment in a place that is still and quiet. Notice if the voice that is speaking to you comes from love, warmth, safety, and constructive direction or if it comes primarily from scarcity, anger, fear, judgement, or control. If it comes from the latter, that is your wounded ego and unhealed pain ineptly trying to protect you, rather than God’s voice, which comes from a place of grace and genuine guidance. If you feel intuitively that your connection to your higher voice (God’s voice) needs some recalibrating or redirection, or that perhaps you may need a reintroduction to Him, now is a great time to dive deep into the Word, read a great book recommended by our resident experts and church Pastors, or by attending one of our Small Groups on this very topic. You could also seek out a respected, Christian life or wellness coach, counselor, or therapist (even one of our Pastors!) to help uncover and honor what that voice is saying.

Mind Health

We say the following words delicately and with love. While being aware of how you are feeling today, or in life in general, all that you are experiencing, is based upon the level of unconditional love you’ve received from childhood until now. The foods and beverages you consume on a daily basis, the overall healthiness of your mind today, and the gentleness you manifest toward your own mind, affect every feeling and experience you have.

Your mind’s true health is first felt within and then brought to light through the way you love yourself and others. How you feel, the health of your mind, and the very life you are living are expressed through your behavior, your actions, how you perceive things in life, and every word you use.

Your mental health matters to God and the bible is FULL of clear instruction on how to have a healthy mind!

Be mindful – you are precious and you matter!

You may come from a background of depression, anxiety, rage, or resentment. You may have learned to face adversity with denial, outbursts of anger, or wanting to brush things under the rug. You may hope that if you don’t see or acknowledge what’s uncomfortable, it either doesn’t exist or will just go away. If this has been you, you must know that this doesn’t work, and you have the power through the Holy Spirit to construct such a better life!

When your mind is healthy, you live with a sense of peace and tranquility that is not only seen and felt in the life that surrounds you, but also through those that you allow into your life. If there is something that is consistently broken in your life, this is not the time to look outside yourself, but rather within, to get to the truth of the state of your mind and whether it is serving the life God has for you.

Casting Anxiety on God: The Bible encourages believers to cast their anxieties on God, finding peace and comfort in Him. Philippians 4:6-7 (NIV) says, “Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”

Renewing the Mind: The Bible teaches the importance of renewing the mind through God’s Word and focusing on positive, uplifting thoughts. Romans 12:2 (NIV) says, “Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.”

Mental Health (con’t)

Seeking Help and Support: The Bible encourages believers to seek help and support from others in times of distress. Galatians 6:2 (NIV) says, “Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ.”

Prayer and Meditation: Engaging in prayer and meditation on God’s Word can bring peace and clarity to the mind. Psalm 19:14 (NIV) says, “May these words of my mouth and this meditation of my heart be pleasing in your sight, Lord, my Rock and my Redeemer.”

Finding Strength in Weakness: The Bible acknowledges human weakness and encourages reliance on God’s strength in times of struggle.

Community and Fellowship: Being part of a supportive community of believers can contribute to mental and emotional well-being.

  • For one week, make a comprehensive list of foods and beverages that you consume on a daily basis, paying close attention to the true nutritional value that they bring to your body and mind health – or not! Be mindful of the reasons behind everything that you eat or drink.
  • Do all that you can to get the help and support that you may need so that you and others around you can experience all the magnificence that life has waiting!
  • Acknowledge what may be needed to start making the shifts toward true mind health and self-awareness.
  • Consult a trusted friend or a skilled professional who will not only listen but respectfully challenge your perceptions with grace, healthy boundaries, and a bit of tough love.
Ego Health

What is the health of your ego? Most people tend to assume that the ego is strictly negative and aligned with some form of narcissism. We assure you it is not. In fact, your ego was originally created to become a beautiful part of your identity, setting the boundaries that allow you to healthily react to life’s experiences and challenges.

The fitness and well-being of your ego is not only recognized through the way you respond to life but is also seen and felt by others. In the beginning, you were born with a beautiful and healthy ego that was originally designed to protect you as you navigated the world. As a child, your ego met life with curiosity, innocence, faith, love, and trust, and in turn, it embodied these very characteristics. Similar to a well-built home, constructed to withstand the elements and storms that could leave its foundation vulnerable; in childhood your ego might have become worn down by the elements that surrounded you. Such environmental hazards could include emotionally detached parents, shame, divorce, abuse, bullying, family addiction, poverty, trauma, and so on.

Therefore, the truth of your ego today can be understood through your behaviors, experiences, and feelings as demonstrated through grace, peace, compassion, love, empathy, truth-telling, excitement, joy, curiosity, good health, happy marriages, happy children, and even the light of your face and skin. Conversely, a damaged ego shows up as shame, criticism, closed-mindedness, control, abuse, addiction, struggle, conflict, hatefulness, gossip, chronic pain, stress, anxiety, and even unhealthy body manifestations. Which ego state is yours? Many of us have elements of both to lesser or greater degrees. If you are being truly honest with yourself, you know deep down that an unhealthy ego does not serve you, those that you care about, or the world or society at large, and this at times crazy world is experiencing fractured egos now more than ever.

If you have been going through life with a wounded ego, know that it is not your fault. In fact, as you know, just about everyone else around you is wounded to a certain extent as well. The great news is that you do not need to continue your life debilitated by unhappiness, pain, brokenness, guilt, shame, loneliness, and negativity. It is ultimately up to you what constructive changes you choose to make in order to live your life to the fullest, especially in adulthood and in your romantic relationships.

Laying down our pride and walking in the humility that the life of Jesus lays out for us, is key to showing up well in our relationships. Let’s look at some ways the bible beautifully outlines this intension:

Pride and Humility: The Bible frequently warns against pride and promotes humility. James 4:6 (NIV) says, “God opposes the proud but shows favor to the humble.”

Selflessness and Service: Jesus taught the importance of selflessness and serving others. John 13:14 says, “If I then your Lord and Teacher have washed your feet, you also, ought to wash one anothers feet. For I have given you an example, that you also should do just as I have done to you.”

Putting Others First: Philippians 2:3-4 (NIV) encourages believers to value others above themselves, saying, “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others.”

Guarding Against Arrogance: Romans 12:3 (NIV) advises, “Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment, in accordance with the faith God has distributed to each of you.”

  • Acknowledge situations from your past that may have led to the wounding of your ego.
  • Identify in your journal the ways in which you communicate or behave through an unhealthy ego.
  • Identify ways in which you can express your healthy ego.
  • Choose to start letting the behaviors of your unhealthy ego melt away and your beautiful original ego take hold so that you can live the life that you deserve.
Spirit Health

The spirit is the essence of your spirit is special and shows up differently than that of your soul. The distinction between spirit and soul in the Bible can be somewhat nuanced and can vary, depending on theological interpretation. Different passages and perspectives offer various insights into this question.

Spirit: In many biblical contexts, the spirit refers to the immaterial aspect of humanity that connects with God. It’s often associated with the breath of life given by God (Genesis 2:7) and the innermost part of a person that can commune with God (Romans 8:16). The soul is considered the seat of emotions, will, and conscience.

In your life today, to make the distinction, think of a healthy soul as one might think of as an ‘adult’, or teacher, while your spirit can be seen as a vibrant, inquisitive, playful teen. It is your spirit, that holds the majority of your overall personality through which you experience life, and others experience you.

Your spirit is healthy, when it is felt as light, free, peaceful, and joyful. Your Spirit can be experienced as unhealthy, when it is infused with sadness, depression, or detachment. The well-being of your spirit, prior to and especially once truly knowing Jesus, can be readily seen in the sparkle of your eyes, through serenity, vibrance, and true joy.

If your spirit has been in pain, and is not connected to the Holy Spirit, your eyes may show up as dull, removed, sad, or even blank, as a sign of a spirit that has been dimmed. Where this can be confusing is that you might meet someone with a perceived twinkle in their eyes, a playfulness and vitality in their spirit, but if you sit back and watch their behaviors, they can come off not just as free and adolescent, but as immature and careless. The health of your spirit is important because it affects the entirety of your everyday life as well as the world around you.

Life can either be handled in a mature, helpful, and constructive manner or in a way that ultimately does not serve you, especially in your relationships. It is easy to tell the the true health of your spirit, based on how well your life is going, sensed through the unmistakable peace that energetically surrounds you, which ultimately comes from a true relationship with Jesus. With a healthy spirit, you attract healthy people. You live a life that is responsible yet still filled with joy and childlike wonder. It is not filled with unnecessary drama or struggle.

Now, it’s time to find a mirror and peacefully look into it; smile in as big and pure a manner that you can. Take your hand, and cover your smile in your reflection. While doing so, look deeply at and into your eyes, and see what they truly reflect. Do they look light, happy, and peaceful? Or do they reveal stress, anger, pain, or detachment?

Regardless of what you see, approach your reflection with gentleness and love, and thank it for showing you the truth of what lies within. If what you are experiencing indicates that your spirit needs love and attention, then it is time to honor yourself by getting real with how, where, and why your life needs some nurturing. Take your journal and notes section and identify the areas of your life that have been robbing you from true love and fulfillment, whether it be your own actions and behaviors, areas of necessary healing, or the behaviors of others.

While creating this list, note some ways that you believe healing can begin. There is no shame in not being perfect! It’s just time for you and your life to experience all of the amazing gifts God has waiting for you.

The Bible offers guidance on nurturing a healthy spirit, emphasizing spiritual well-being, growth, and vitality. Here are some key principles and passages:

Relationship with God: Maintaining a close relationship with God is fundamental to having a healthy spirit. This involves regular prayer, worship, and reading of scripture. Psalm 42:1-2 (NIV) expresses the longing for God: “As the deer pants for streams of water, so my soul pants for you, my God. My soul thirsts for God, for the living God. When can I go and meet with God?”

Renewal and Transformation: Romans 12:2 (NIV) encourages believers to renew their minds: “Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.” This renewal involves aligning one’s thoughts and attitudes with God’s truth.

Fruit of the Spirit: Galatians 5:22-23 (NIV) lists the fruit of the Spirit: “love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control.” Cultivating these qualities in one’s life contributes to a healthy spirit and reflects the work of God within.

Faith and Trust in God: Proverbs 3:5-6 (NIV) advises, “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.” Trusting in God’s providence and sovereignty contributes to a healthy spirit, even in times of uncertainty or difficulty.

Nurturing a healthy spirit involves a vibrant relationship with God, continual renewal and transformation, cultivating the fruit of the Spirit, exercising wisdom and discernment, engaging in community, practicing gratitude, and placing our faith and trust in God.

  • Seek to clarify the distinction between your spirit and your soul.
  • Identify whether your spirit is healthy through such indicators as we see in the bible.
  • See the ways above we can get out spirit in check with the Lord! Which area needs the most focus right now?
  • Note in your journal the areas of your life that have been robbing you from true love and fulfillment, whether it be your own actions and behaviors, areas of necessary healing, or the behaviors of others.
  • While creating this list, note some ways that you believe healing can begin and lovingly get started.
Self Control

Self-control! This is a big one – probably bigger than you might think! Just how in control are you really? And what does being in control mean to you? Do you have to be “right” in order to feel safe, calm, and happy? Does everything in your life have to be perfectly in line? If something is out of place in your home, does it trigger a pang in your gut? Does it cause you anxiety if you notice that a picture on the wall is crooked, or do you simply regard it calmly, knowing it can be straightened at any time? Do you feel controlled by your environment, your life, your thoughts, or someone close to you in your life?

The practice of self-control is actually not about control at all, but rather becoming aware of your need to control and what controls you. What is key to successful mastery is grasping the ability – carried out with peace, harmony, and balance, especially through the Holy Spirit – to fully let go of that which holds you back from your highest self, your relationship with God, and your overall experience in life. Every area of your life in which you feel a deep need to control is actually attached either to a childhood wound that has yet to be fully recognized and healed. Such ways of control range from the thoughts in your head (e.g. ruminating on the negative or bullying others to your will) to the food you put in your body (e.g. binge eating) to the reactions you have to what is happening in the world around you (e.g. angry outbursts or drinking too much). True self-control is the ability to sit in your highest self in your adulthood, without needing to compulsively react and control. Instead, observe everything happening in your world with a state of grace, curiosity, and mindfulness. This takes a level of spiritual self-discipline vital for you to be open to all of life’s teachers, gifts, and love, especially through Jesus!

Go to your Journal & Notes section, and as honestly and mindfully as you can, take note of every possible area of your life that you either try to control, feel the need to control, or would like to be in control. The same goes for areas of your life where you may have handed over control unnecessarily or even destructively to yourself or others. Next, take a look at your life beginning with your childhood, and seek to find a relationship between the wounds of your past to the areas of your life that you presently attempt to control, as this is a gateway that the enemy loves to sneak in through. Nonetheless, hold each of these memories and feelings with grace, love, and compassion, not with shame. Find a way in which you can grant forgiveness first to yourself, and if able, to another. Once you have identified these areas of unhelpful control, close your eyes and see yourself in each of these individual moments from your past.

Take this weekend to practice and process what you have learned during this past week’s homework, as you build your Love House. Share in the Journal & Notes section, any triggers, and/or new found awareness that may have come up for you, and most importantly, how you choose to apply this new understanding to your life and to others, starting with yourself and your relationship with Jesus.

Envision yourself releasing the hook that these painful experiences may have dug into you, along with the ensuing behaviors attached to these memories.

The Bible places significant emphasis on self-control for right living and spiritual growth. Here are some life-giving key passages that address the importance of self-control:

Discipline and Self-Mastery: Proverbs 25:28 (NIV) states, “Like a city whose walls are broken through is a person who lacks self-control.” This imagery highlights the vulnerability and lack of protection that comes with a lack of self-control. Being a steadfast person in a relationship requires the discipline and self-mastery of self control.

Temperance and Moderation: Proverbs 16:32 (NIV) says, “Better a patient person than a warrior, one with self-control than one who takes a city.” This verse emphasizes the strength and wisdom in exercising self-control rather than succumbing to impulsive or aggressive behavior, which is never the answer, especially in relationships!

Avoiding Temptation: Proverbs 4:27 (NIV) advises, “Do not turn to the right or the left; keep your foot from evil.” This verse underscores the importance of self-control in resisting temptation and staying on the path of righteousness.

  • Determine whether you feel controlled by your environment, your life, your thoughts, or someone close to you in your life.
  • Observe everything happening in your world with a state of grace, curiosity, and mindfulness and without a need to compulsively react and control.
  • Write in your journal every possible area of your life that you either try to control, feel the need to control, or would like to be in control.
  • Seek to find a relationship between the wounds of your past to the areas of your life that you presently attempt to control.
  • Envision yourself releasing the hook that these painful experiences may have dug into you, along with the ensuing behaviors attached to these memories.
Body & Fitness

Oh, that beautiful bod of yours! Yes, this is exactly how you should look at it and treat it, as your body is truly your temple and loving vessel, that unconditionally carries you through life. However, most people unfortunately experience their bodies only through the lens of the ego. For example, you may have looked at your body primarily as a sexual vehicle utilized when sharing intimate or sensual moments with another. Or you could see it as a receptacle for illness or pain. You might also view your body as a trophy to show off or as a mess with flaws to hide. Nonetheless, your body is absolutely perfect and beautiful just as it is, and it is crucial for you to recognize this in its truest form.

Your body also gives you loving warning signs regarding the true state of your health through such indicators as the glow of your skin, the pangs in your stomach, the aches in your joints, or even the tugs of depression. What you may have been considering a mere bag of protoplasm is actually the most caring, loyal, supportive physical “companion” you will ever have. Regardless of whether you champion it or abuse it, your body remains with you in whatever form until the very end, and it also reveals the truth of how you genuinely love yourself.

The human body serves us in so many ways. It carries and fights every illness in our cells. It sees beauty in the sunset, sheds tears when a loss is mourned, and reassures when a loving touch occurs. Yet humans too often mistreat their bodies through the toxins that they allow into these beautiful and life-affirming vessels. You may abuse your body through excess consumption of unhealthy foods, alcohol, drugs, or even pollutants, or you may allow others to harm your body through criticism, harsh words, or uninvited touch. If you are engaging in any of these behaviors, this is not meant for you to feel shame, but rather an opportunity to exercise compassion toward yourself and to set healthy boundaries, as people too often treat themselves as adults the way that they may have been mistreated during their formative years. If you were abandoned, you will most likely find ways to abandon yourself – until you are able to love yourself as God loves you, and in ways that honor your true worth.

How heartbreaking that so many have missed out on recognizing the amazing gift of their body. People need to refrain from deeming the body as “fat,” “ugly,” “too thin,” or “not in shape” as opposed to being perfectly made. However you have managed your body past or present, it is vital that you see it and treat it with love and pure respect, for it is truly the only one you will ever have from the moment you are born til the day that you expire.

Do you send your body loving thoughts as well as renewing energy? Do you take in fresh air to revitalize your lungs? Do you nourish it with nutritious and balanced foods? Do you hydrate yourself with enough water? Do you exercise, move, and stretch those wonderful joints and limbs? Or do you look at your body and say, “Yuck!”? Do you abuse your body by staying stagnant and abandoning it until it has no choice but to beg for your attention? At the end of the day, taking your body for granted reveals a detached and fractured ego, which clearly does not serve you, nor honors God.

This is a good time for self-reflection and to go to your Journal & Notes Section. Picture your body in your mind, and note all the thoughts that you have when thinking of your body. Does this line up with who God says you are? Notice and record the first thoughts that you have when seeing your body. Also, notice how you’ve taken care of it. Do you tell yourself, “I look absolutely beautiful and amazing!”? Or, do you think of it as “Gross…” as you find every self-perceived flaw? Regardless of what you observe, respect it as the perfect vessel that God created, given to you at birth, that carries many amazing experiences of love, joy, and wisdom. Thank your body for being alive and never leaving you. Make the decision to do all that you can moving forward to honor it in every way possible. With self-compassion, jot down all the different ways that you have abandoned your body up to this point, and make a list of the things that you are going to do to start treating your body with the respect it deserves. Each day, start your morning with a good stretch and a deep cleansing breath. Choose one set of your favorite workout each day as well, and finish the day with another good stretch and a deep calming breath before you lie down to sleep. Relish in this newfound experience as you evolve along with that beautiful bod of yours!

The bible has some key instruction for us on how to honor our bodies best, which are considered temples of the Holy Spirit. Here are some key principles related to maintaining physical health according to biblical teachings:

Temple of the Holy Spirit: 1 Corinthians 6:19-20, emphasizes the sacredness of our bodies and the importance of treating them with respect.

Healthy Eating: The Bible provides guidance on food choices, advocating for a balanced and nutritious diet. In Genesis 1:29 (NIV), God initially provides fruits and vegetables as food for humanity: “Then God said, ‘I give you every seed-bearing plant on the face of the whole earth and every tree that has fruit with seed in it. They will be yours for food.'” Again, in Genesis 9:3 God tells Noah, “Every beast that lives shall be yours to eat…I give you all of these.

Rest and Sabbath: Rest is essential for physical health and is emphasized in the biblical concept of Sabbath. Exodus 20:8-10 (NIV) instructs, “Remember the Sabbath day by keeping it holy. Six days you shall labor and do all your work, but the seventh day is a Sabbath to the Lord your God. On it you shall not do any work, neither you, nor your son or daughter, nor your male or female servant, nor your animals, nor any foreigner residing in your towns.” Observing periods of rest and relaxation is crucial for maintaining physical and mental health.

Avoiding Substance Abuse: The Bible warns against excessive drinking and other forms of substance abuse. Ephesians 5:18 (NIV) cautions, “Do not get drunk on wine, which leads to debauchery. Instead, be filled with the Spirit.” Similarly, 1 Corinthians 6:10 (NIV) lists drunkenness among behaviors that prevent inheriting the kingdom of God.

The Bible does offers us detailed guidelines on physical health, by providing us principles and values that promote a holistic approach to well-being, encompassing spiritual, mental, and physical aspects of life.

  • Recognize first that your body is absolutely perfect and beautiful just as it is, and it should be treated with the respect that it duly deserves.
  • Maintain your body in working order through such vital ingredients as fresh air, nutritious and balanced diet, plentiful hydration, sufficient exercise, and even positive affirmations of gratitude.
  • Disrobe in front of a full-length mirror, and note in your journal all the thoughts that you have when seeing your naked body.
  • Jot down all the different ways that you have abandoned your body up to this point, and make a list of the things that you are going to do to start treating your body with the respect that it deserves.
Financial Wellness

Money – this is a big one, especially how you treat and think of it! It not only affects your identity and experience in love but also the value in which you see yourself, and the security you feel in life, and it can be a massive illusion that blocks you from love and the right partner.

Identifying too much power with money on any level is a huge risk. There is a spiritual necessity to honor and respect whatever amount of money you have. This is true even if it’s a single penny that you find on the ground and your attitude toward that single penny and your subsequent reaction, reveals volumes about your relationship with money. In fact, how you treat money is exactly how it shows up in your life. Do you look at money with fear or anxiety? With disregard? With greed? Or with appreciation? How do you spend your money? Do you treat your finances coming from a place of lack or from abundance? Do you give your money freely or stingily? Every amount of money you have, no matter how much, is a gift to be honored and respected, and it gets to be held loosely but with grace and gratitude. Remember, everything you have comes from the Lord!

When it comes to money, it’s not how much you have but also how you actually received it. Did you earn it based on hard work, gratitude, and healthy pride, or did you use and abuse others to enrich yourself? Do your finances stem from something you enjoy? At what point does the money that you have become enough?

An unhealthy attitude toward money often revolves around scarcity and control.

You have an independent and personal responsibility to respect money yet not to grant it inappropriate power.

No, money is not everything, but your financial wellness is an integral part of your overall well-being, as it reflects the underlying health and balance of your true state of mind.

How responsible are you with your money and how you spend it? Or rather, how you save it? Do you truly have enough for a rainy day? Do you have enough set aside to sustain you if you don’t earn a single penny for the next 6 months? This is an opportunity to create boundaries that honor your true priorities.

You may find it helpful to meet with a respected and reputable financial advisor (perhaps even your own accountant), to look at the reality of the money you’ve spent in the last year, and where your financial future is headed. This is also a great time to take advantage of Dave Ramsey’s biblical direction on money and finances.

Bottom line, if your experience around money doesn’t feel good or you’re noticing inklings of shame, fear, or struggle, let yourself feel those feelings, and love yourself first by forgiving yourself. Every day is a brand-new day full of possibility, and tomorrow can feel wholly different in how you choose to spend, earn, and experience your money.

What does the Bible say about money?

Stewardship: The Bible teaches that everything belongs to God, and we are merely stewards of His resources. This perspective guides how we handle our finances. 1 Corinthians 4:2: “Now it is required that those who have been given a trust must prove faithful.”

Avoiding Debt: The Bible cautions against accumulating debt and encourages responsible financial management. Proverbs 22:7: “The rich rule over the poor, and the borrower is slave to the lender.”

Hard Work and Diligence: The Bible emphasizes the value of hard work and diligence in providing for oneself and others. Proverbs 10:4: “Lazy hands make for poverty, but diligent hands bring wealth.”

Generosity: God calls His people to be generous and to give to those in need. 2 Corinthians 9:7: “Each of you should give what you have decided in your heart to give, not reluctantly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver.”

Contentment: Finding contentment in God’s provision and avoiding the pursuit of wealth for its own sake are important themes in the Bible. Hebrews 13:5: “Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have, because God has said, ‘Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.'”

Seeking God’s Kingdom First: Prioritizing God’s kingdom over earthly wealth leads to true fulfillment and security. Matthew 6:33: “But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.”

By applying these biblical principles, you can experience greater financial wellness and align their finances with God’s purposes and values.

  • Ask yourself how you treat money, as that is exactly how it shows up in your life.
  • Pay attention to how responsible you are with your money and how you spend and save it.
  • Create boundaries that honor your true financial and life priorities.
  • Meet with a respected and reputable financial advisor to look at the reality of the money you’ve spent in the last year, the interest that you’ve spent on any money borrowed, and the matter of whether this feels good to you and honors your highest self.
  • Know that every day is a brand-new day full of possibility, and tomorrow can feel wholly different in how you choose to spend, earn, and experience your money.
Work & Calling

When you see or hear the word “work,” notice your reaction. Do you instantly smile? Do you feel joy at what is a labor of love that invigorates you; regardless of the amount of money you make? Or do you feel instantly anxious or stressed? Do you feel an unhealthy pressure to conform to society’s expectations in order to achieve what others deem to be success for you? Do you feel calm after reading these questions, or is your heart pounding in your chest?!

If your work isn’t bringing you joy and satisfaction, you have a lot to think about! Most people reading this have to work to survive, while some of you may have been born into wealth or hit the lottery. Nonetheless, work is not necessarily meant to be just about putting food on the table. Instead, it is an incredible way for you to show your connection to your calling and to honor God. Whether you are a doctor who is passionate about healing and saving lives or you are the best darn shoe shiner at the airport, all that you do is seen, experienced, and honored back through life, by the joy and the passion you put into it. This is also true as well in jobs that may not involve financial compensation, whether you donate your time to your favorite charity or you are a parent passionate about raising the most happy and balanced children into joyful, Jesus-loving, thriving adults. If you are passionate about people and making someone smile, that can be done in countless ways. Regardless of whether you work for a paycheck or not, it is crucial that you find and honor your calling, which is one of the most rewarding ways in which you can give back to the bountiful world that awaits.

The Bible provides principles and guidance regarding our work and calling, emphasizing the importance of diligence, honesty, and stewardship in our vocations. Here are some key teachings to keep in mind on the topic of work & calling…

Work as a Responsibility: The Bible teaches that work is a fundamental aspect of human life and a responsibility given by God. Genesis 2:15 (NIV) states, “The Lord God took the man and put him in the Garden of Eden to work it and take care of it.” Work is portrayed as a means of fulfilling God-given purposes and contributing to the flourishing of creation.

Diligence and Excellence: Proverbs 10:4 (NIV) says, “Lazy hands make for poverty, but diligent hands bring wealth.” Throughout Proverbs and other books, diligence, and hard work are consistently praised as virtues. Colossians 3:23-24 (NIV) emphasizes doing our work wholeheartedly: “Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters, since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving.”

Providing for One’s Family: 1 Timothy 5:8 (NIV) instructs, “Anyone who does not provide for their relatives, and especially for their own household, has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.” This passage underscores the importance of working diligently to provide for the needs of one’s family and dependents.

Stewardship and Generosity: Ephesians 4:28 (NIV) teaches, “Anyone who has been stealing must steal no longer, but must work, doing something useful with their own hands, that they may have something to share with those in need.” This verse emphasizes the importance of working not only to meet one’s own needs but also to be able to help others through generosity and stewardship.

Finding Fulfillment in Work: Ecclesiastes 2:24-25 (NIV) acknowledges the enjoyment and fulfillment that can come from meaningful work: “A person can do nothing better than to eat and drink and find satisfaction in their own toil. This too, I see, is from the hand of God, for without him, who can eat or find enjoyment?”

There is no job that doesn’t come with tremendous value, as the work that you do as an individual impacts yourself and others either positively or negatively. Your attitude, beginning with the way you honor yourself, shows up in everything you do.

  • Acknowledge to yourself whether you feel fulfilled with the work that you do.
  • Identify in your journal what you had wanted to be as a child once you grew up. Ask yourself whether you are today where you originally wanted to be in life, and if not, determine what lies in that gap between your wildest dreams and your present reality.
  • Visualize and feel what is necessary to propel your life in the direction that you deserve, and make an action plan that enables you to supercharge that amazing life of yours.
Self Truth

John 14:6 (NIV): “Jesus answered, ‘I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.’

This one is massive, so take heed! You are about to enter the sphere of ‘self-truth’ which effects everything that relates to the quality of love and relationships that you have in your life. Your self truth is your ability to be absolutely honest with yourself by acting as an accurate and honest mirror for your actions, thoughts, and words, and the extent to which you are truly honoring these elements in your life.

In addition, in a culture that wants to sell you on ‘self truth’ and ‘your truth’ as the only truth, we can unite around the fact that we have ONE truth, and his name is Jesus! And thank goodness we have Him as our true north, for truth! Because of this, we no longer have to look to ourselves for what our actions, thoughts, words, and value systems have to be, but we can look to Jesus for what they should be instead, then evaluate the extent to which you are truly honoring these elements in your life, based off of the example of Jesus!

The key verse above, Jesus describes Himself as “the truth,” indicating that ultimate truth is only found in Him. This verse is often interpreted to mean that truth is not merely a concept or set of principles but is personified in Jesus Christ.

This is the moment to examine your capacity to be fully real with yourself and others, and to notice your tendency to ignore or abandon the truth and values found in the life of Jesus. This may show up in your life through behaviors ranging from being easily irritated to being quick to judge to flat-out lying to becoming co-dependent or passive aggressive.

Now, is the time to get authentic and open! It is through this radical honesty that you can identify potential emotional or mental blocks that prevent the kind of love you desire from entering your life. At times this may seem like a scary step for you, but it is essential to identify these barriers so that you can release them (to God) and disarm these behaviors of their debilitating power. This gives you the invigorating freedom to allow love into your life!

The life of Jesus provides us truth in his teaching and parables: His teachings and parables, recorded in the Gospels of the New Testament, provide moral and spiritual truths that continue to resonate with people today. Through His words, Jesus conveyed profound truths about love, forgiveness, compassion, justice, and the Kingdom of God.

Overall, the life of Jesus provides truth through His teachings, example, revelation of God’s nature, redemptive work, and fulfillment of prophecy. As Christians seek to follow Jesus and align their lives with His, they are guided by the truth He embodied and proclaimed!

Proverbs 11:1 (NIV) says, “The Lord detests dishonest scales, but accurate weights find favor with him.” The Bible consistently condemns dishonesty, fraud, and exploitation in work. Instead, it promotes integrity, honesty, and fairness in all dealings.

  • Examine your capacity to be fully real with yourself and others, and notice your tendency to ignore or abandon certain biblical truths and values.
  • Note in your journal the areas in your life where you have not been fully honest with yourself or others. Make sure to do this with grace, understanding, compassion, and self-forgiveness.
  • Identify barriers and behaviors that clearly prevent love and truth from entering your life.
  • Write down whatever lies you may have been telling yourself (and others) that have been holding you back. Then tear out these pages from your journal and rip them into tiny pieces, placing them in an envelope which you can burn, throw in a dumpster, or mail to yourself as a symbolic reminder of the untruths you have lovingly released from your life.
  • Do this process regularly to clear any unnecessary waste that stands between you and your highest self.
  • Take this weekend to practice and process what you have learned during this past week’s homework, as you build your Love House. Share in the Journal & Notes section, any triggers, and/or new found awareness that may have come up for you, and most importantly, how you choose to apply this new understanding to your life and to others, starting with yourself and your relationship with Jesus.
Self Love

Have you learned how to truly love yourself?

When you think of self-love, what comes to mind? Does the answer instantly come from your ego – perhaps focusing on what a “good person” you are? Or what you’ve accumulated through your bank account, your workouts, your wardrobe, your car, or your popularity with others? Are you surrounded by people who may leave you the moment your name, fame, finances, looks, or other external attributes might disappear? Or does the answer seem to come from a place rooted in Christ and His love for you?! Do you have the ability to truly love yourself and others, deeply and compassionately, flaws and all? Are you surrounded by many wonderful friends and genuine truth tellers, who treat you with loving respect and who love you just for you, not for what you provide?

The bible gives us a clear stance on self love, that can be broken down into 4 key sections:

Love Yourself as God Loves You: While the Bible emphasizes love for God and others, it also teaches that individuals are created in the image of God and are deeply loved by Him. Understanding and accepting God’s love for oneself can foster a sense of self-worth and acceptance (John 3:16, Romans 5:8, Ephesians 2:4-5).

Love Your Neighbor as Yourself: In Mark 12:31 (ESV), Jesus says, “You shall love your neighbor as yourself.” This implies that a healthy love for oneself is assumed as the standard by which we should love others.

Forgive Yourself: The Bible emphasizes the importance of forgiveness, including forgiving oneself. Passages such as Psalm 103:12 (“As far as the east is from the west, so far does he remove our transgressions from us”) imply that once forgiven by God, we should also forgive ourselves.

Humility and Esteeming Others: Philippians 2:3-4 encourages humility and considering others’ interests as more significant than one’s own. While not directly about self-love, it teaches a balanced perspective that doesn’t overemphasize self-interest.

  • Which of these 4 ways to biblically love yourself, do you need to focus on growing and improving the most?
  • How has a lack of biblical self love prevented you from finding love in the past?
  • Who can hold you accountable to continued action steps in walking in this new Christ-centered self love?
Peace

“Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.” John 14:27 (NIV)

How much peace do you truly have in your life?

Certainly not enough, if you are trying to muster it up from within yourself, instead of through Him. Luckily, we do not need to find peace from ourselves or other people, but from the endless supply of peace that Jesus gives, as outlined above.

How carefree and connected to yourself and to Him are you? Lately, would you consider yourself to be more serene – or anxious? Do you tend to face life’s stressors with grace and calm, or do you let them rule your existence? It is especially during difficult times that you realize your true capacity for the peace that you surround yourself with, that you omit, and that you create through mindful prayer, and seeking the voice of the Holy Spirit turning to Him with all that’s happening around you. Only then, can you experience true biblical peace! It’s easy to feel peaceful or comfortable, even relaxed, when all is going well. However, each and every one of you will come across a moment of stress or challenge, which is only natural in life. Seek to experience each challenge by first sitting back and observing what feelings you are having, do this with a gentle grace and understanding for yourself rather than reacting in a knee-jerk fashion. Allow yourself to realize the power you truly have through your relationship with Christ, giving you the calm to sit in the moment and realize as 2 Corinthians 4:17, tells us: for our present troubles are small and won’t last very long… Therefore, this too shall pass!

The Bible provides guidance on how to obtain peace in various aspects of life. Here are some ways it tells us to find peace:

Trust in God: Trusting in God’s grace, sovereignty, and goodness, is fundamental to experiencing peace. The Bible encourages believers to cast their anxieties on God and trust Him to provide for their needs (Philippians 4:6-7, Matthew 6:25-34).

Seek Righteousness: Pursuing righteousness and living according to God’s ways leads to inner peace. The Bible teaches that those who walk in integrity and righteousness will experience peace (Isaiah 32:17, James 3:18).

Maintain a Steadfast Mind: Keeping our minds focused on God and His truth helps to maintain peace. Scripture advises believers to fix their thoughts on whatever is true, noble, right, pure, lovely, and admirable (Philippians 4:8, Isaiah 26:3).

Be Peacemakers: Actively seeking reconciliation and promoting peace in relationships is central to Christian living. Jesus blessed the peacemakers, indicating that they are truly acting as children of God (Matthew 5:9, Romans 12:18).

Prayer and Communion with God: Spending time in prayer and communing with God helps to cultivate peace in our hearts. The Bible encourages believers to bring their concerns and worries to God in prayer and to seek His presence continually (Philippians 4:6-7, 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18).

Live in Unity with Others: Striving for unity and harmony within the body of believers fosters peace. Paul encourages Christians to live in harmony with one another and to be of the same mind and spirit (Romans 12:16, Ephesians 4:3).

Remember God’s Promises: Reminding ourselves of God’s promises and His faithfulness in the past can bring peace in times of trouble. The Bible is full of promises of God’s presence, protection, and provision for His people (Isaiah 41:10, Psalm 119:165).

By following these principles and relying on God’s strength and guidance, believers can experience the peace that surpasses understanding even in the midst of life’s challenges and trials.

  • Ask yourself whether or not you are truly at peace and what that means for you.
  • Understand why you may not have been at peace until now. Take ownership of why that might be, whether it stems from your own unhelpful behavior, or you’ve allowed yourself to stay in an unhealthy dynamic for far too long.
  • Seek to experience all challenges by first sitting back and observing what you are feeling rather than reacting in a knee-jerk, victim-y, or hostile fashion.
  • List in your journal the areas of your life that consume you or distract from your ability for peace. Note how you may have responded to each life test until now.
  • For the next seven days, seek Jesus in each challenge, large or small, that may come your way – for there are many!
  • When you encounter a stressor, practice responding first with stillness, then curiosity, then compassion, then love.
Beauty

“Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight.” 1 Peter 3:3-4 (NIV)

What does beauty mean to you? The word itself might evoke many images and feelings in your mind. Some interpret beauty to be the highest of superficiality that one sees in social media, such as the symmetrical face or so-called perfect dimensions of a supermodel. Others see it in the face of a newborn baby or a desert flower or a stunning sunset. Beauty can also be seen in what society sometimes deems as unattractive. The physically most “beautiful” face and body can turn ugly fast if one’s thoughts and behaviors are dark or dismissive of oneself or others. One that society may not have deemed beautiful can turn stunning in minutes if their spirit reflects love, joy, compassion, intelligence, or great humor. Which one do you choose to be? What is beautiful to you? Do you see yourself as beautiful?

In its rawest form, beauty is a profound energy that shapes the way you see and experience the world around you. What may be blocking you from receiving the love you desire is your interpretation of beauty, for yourself and others.

In our key verses, 1 Peter 3:3-4, the passage addresses the concept of beauty, emphasizing the importance of inner qualities over external appearances. This verse encourages a perspective that contrasts societal standards of beauty focused on external adornment like hairstyles, jewelry, and clothing…material things that our world Is so obsessed with. Instead, it highlights the enduring and valuable beauty found in the inner self, specifically in possessing a gentle and quiet spirit. The emphasis is on qualities of character, humility, and a tranquil demeanor, suggesting that these inner attributes hold great significance in the sight of God. The verse underscores the idea that true and lasting beauty is rooted in the character of an individual, rather than superficial or materialistic qualities.

  • Ask yourself what this biblical definition of beauty brings up in your spirit? Do you agree with it or disagree with it? How are you living it out well today? How could you do better?
  • Do you see yourself as beautiful, both inside and out? How do you see and experience beauty with yourself and the world around you?
  • Journal ways you may be blocking yourself from receiving the love you desire when it comes to your perception of beauty.
  • Reflect on what you’ve learned about the meaning of beauty when it comes to love in your life and reassess what serves you in a healthy way so that you can implement those necessary changes.
Apperence & Style

Your clothing, appearance, and personal style can reveal so much of who you are, how you feel about yourself in the here and now, and how you feel about the world at large. What you wear can tell others how happy, confident, and comfortable you are with yourself and the world around you.

Think of your wardrobe and personal style as your (healthy or unhealthy) ego’s costume in life, that represents you, your value system, and how you look at life. Also, know that it affects how you are experienced by others. Yes, it is important to look your best, but that can mean many different things depending on the context. It can certainly be rewarding to find and wear the best in current fashion, colors, and materials that make you happy, regardless of the price point. However, notice if you find that you do not feel good enough about yourself, because perhaps you are unable to wear or afford what society considers ‘on trend’, or the “best-of-the-best.”

Perhaps you have unhealthily tied your identity to certain brands with which you adorn yourself. Or, you may find yourself dreading what you’ll wear next or feeling displaced with the wardrobe you have. If so, sit with yourself and get quiet for a moment, and seek to discover where these beliefs started. Ask yourself what it is that you’re feeling and experiencing around your clothing and style. Do your clothes and style represent the best, happiest, most confident, joyful you? Or do your clothes cover up parts of you, or your body, that you’re not pleased with? Do they hide the best parts of you and your true personality? If so, how and why?

Everywhere you look has a potential fashion show of people uncovering the truth about how they authentically feel about themselves. Notice what you like, appreciate, and recognize in others through their choice of wardrobe and how it all makes you feel.

This is a good time to schedule in your calendar, a few hours with a close friend, to sit in your closet, and try your clothes on piece by piece. Ask yourself whether each item brings you joy comfort, and healthy confidence. What in your closet specifically needs to change? This can be really fun and exciting, but make sure to take baby steps as you move into your fullest, most beautiful you!

When doing this assignment, grab two large garbage bags. One, is for every piece of clothing you own that is either torn, falling apart, no longer fits you, or you haven’t worn for the last two years. Think of this as a healthy spiritual declutter! When ready, bring these items to a place that can refurbish them, as opposed to throwing them away. The other bag is for every piece of clothing that you have enjoyed but no longer wear. Donate these items to a local organization whose donations may bring joy to someone else in need.

While going through this process, keep in mind these biblical truths in regard to your appearance & style:

Modesty is key!

“I also want the women to dress modestly, with decency and propriety, adorning themselves, not with elaborate hairstyles or gold or pearls or expensive clothes, but with good deeds, appropriate for women who profess to worship God.” 1 Timothy 2:9-10

Your inner self is always the most beautiful part of you :)

“Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight.” 1 Peter 3:3-4

The Lord does not look at the outward things…

“But the Lord said to Samuel, ‘Do not consider his appearance or his height, for I have rejected him. The Lord does not look at the things people look at. People look at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.‘” 1 Samuel 16:7

  • Think of your wardrobe and personal style as your (healthy or unhealthy) ego’s costume in life that represents you, your value system, and how you look at life.
  • Ask yourself if your clothes and style represent the best, happiest, most confident, joyful you or if they cover up parts of you or your body that you’re not pleased with.
  • Delve within and identify where any negative beliefs you may have about how you clothe and style yourself may have come from.
  • Notice what you like, appreciate, and recognize in others through their choice of wardrobe and how it all makes you feel.
  • Examine your closet and wardrobe with a close friend, try things on piece by piece, and ask yourself whether each item brings you happiness, comfort, and healthy confidence.
  • Grab two large garbage bags to help edit your wardrobe. One is for every piece of clothing you own that is either torn, falling apart, no longer fits you, or you haven’t worn for the last two years. The other bag is for every piece of clothing that you have enjoyed for years but no longer wear.
  • Notice what your closet reveals and how you present yourself in life.
Face & Skincare

Your face and skin are a genuine reflection not only of your overall health but also of how you view and love yourself. From the foods you put into your body to the products you place on your skin to the amount of sleep you get to the amount of water you ingest, your true beauty along with the energy and glow of your appearance is immediately experienced by others as well as by your own self. It is just as important to be mindful of these factors as it is to use skincare products that honor your value system as well as nurture your body and spirit. Ranging from inexpensive to opulent, lotions and treatments from head to toe are available not only for your enjoyment but also for your ability to bring out your most healthy and youthful radiance.

Whether applying lotion to your face or cream to your body, be sure to pause and be in the moment as you use gentle massage and seek pressure points that may need attention with mindful touch. You might be surprised to see how giving just one simple pressure point a bit of attention can shift your entire state of being. Try to find a way each day to give your entire self the love and attention it deserves. You’ll be blown away that what was once a quick application to simply moisturize your skin has become a nurturing ritual with which you rejuvenate your entire way of being.

For those of you who experience skin imperfections that may have caused you to feel self-conscious and that have felt primarily out of your control, such as forms of acne, birthmarks, scarring from wounds or pregnancy, weight change, eczema, or other skin conditions, please know first and foremost that you are stunning just as you are! It is vital to refrain from seeing yourself as flawed, as everything that is unique to you actually gives you the ability to see and experience life, love, and beauty in an even more magnificent way. If you feel though that you want to change an aspect of what you still see as a flaw, first start by speaking to that part of your face or body with compassion, for it is an important part of you and your journey to true and authentic love.

  • Acknowledge that your face and skin are a genuine reflection not only of your overall health but also of how you view and love yourself.
  • Be mindful of how you treat your body. Use face and skincare products that honor your value system as well as nurture your body and spirit.
  • When applying products, be sure to pause and be in the moment as you use gentle massage and seek pressure points that may need attention with mindful touch.
  • Reach out to a trusted friend or respected expert who can advise how to remedy certain skin blemishes, as long as you do this while recognizing that you are beautiful and perfect no matter what you choose to do.
  • Complete an honest inventory and edit of all of your skincare products for your face and body.
Hair

You may not think this is true, but in fact, how you treat your hair (or whatever you have on your head) reflects how you truly feel about yourself. Grab a mirror and take an honest look at your hair. The appearance, style, and overall health of your hair says more about you than you know! If you find that your hair is dry, brittle, or lacking luster or shine, that means that there are some things to address, be it nutritional or aesthetic. It is important that your hair be not only healthy but also honors your energy, spirit and genuine personality in life. If you are bald or your hair is sparse, it is just as necessary to treat your scalp with the same love and attention that you would a full head of hair. For those of you with thinning hair to those of you with a full head of hair keep in mind the same upkeep is essential.

Do you believe that you deserve to be pampered? You may be surprised at this question, even wondering what it has to do with your hair or for that matter love and relationships. However, you would not believe how often people tend to abandon genuine self-care and fail to see its connection with how you treat yourself and in turn what you accept from others.

Start simply by making sure that when you wash your hair (or scalp), you apply your shampoo by massaging it lovingly into your scalp, seeking out pressure points that generate feelings of relaxation and calm. Every day, should be your personal spa day, not a slapdash operation!

How you treat yourself, is how life will treat you in turn!

Ask yourself these questions: Does your hair bring you joy? Does it make you happy? Do the products you use in your hair awaken your senses? For example, ylang-ylang or lavender are ideal to soothe your soul or if you need a pick me up, then give yourself the pleasure of some peppermint or tangerine. There are many wonderful products to keep your hair healthy and vibrant – whether you purchase your hair products at a local pharmacy or the finest salons, there are product lines for everyone, every budget, and every hair type. If perhaps your hair hasn’t been updated since high school, then it’s most likely time for a change!

As in life, we are all here to grow so that we can receive all of the beautiful gifts that life has waiting. This is a great time to ask your closest friends and truth tellers what they think of your hair. Does it fit your personality? Does it bring out the best you? If not, seek out a respected salon to get a fresh cut, style, possible color, and/or conditioning treatment so that you can look and embody your best self.

  • Take a moment to reflect on what you’ve learned about yourself and your hair from this lesson. Jot your thoughts, feelings, and inspiration for change in your Journal and Notes section along with your blueprint. What feelings in particular is it provoking? This is a time to truly begin to see yourself as God sees you!
  • Find a large mirror, and make an honest assessment of your hair (or whatever you have on your head!), its style, and its overall wellness.
  • Treat your hair and scalp with the respect it deserves regarding cleanliness, moisture, and smell.
  • When you apply your shampoo, massage it into your scalp, seeking out pressure points that promote relaxation.
  • Purchase and use quality haircare products that soothe your soul and keep your hair healthy and vibrant.
  • Update your hairstyle if it’s stuck in the Stone Age.
Teeth

This may be a surprise to you, but your teeth are an incredibly important factor when it comes to attracting the right partner. However, before going into more detail, if you are saying to yourself that your teeth are perfect and amazing, that’s great, but then make sure that the beauty of your teeth is in balance with the beauty of your mind and your spiritual well-being.

Back to your teeth! As superficial as it may sound to some, you may be amazed at the extent to which the color, health, and overall state of your teeth affect your love life. Your teeth are actually a window into the state of your physical, mental, and even financial health. Yes, some areas of the world do place far more importance than others on having gleaming white teeth and a perfectly straight smile, yet at the end of the day, if you have yellow, stained, overly crooked, or missing teeth, it’s time to ask yourself why.

Does your mouth properly reflect how you feel about yourself? What can you do to make your teeth and smile healthier? Not only are healthy teeth strong components of a gorgeous smile, but they also can have a great impact on the health of your heart and various other organs. Your mouth is the entrance that many pathogens take to enter your body, and it is also what your future partner kisses. This is the mouth that sustains you through breathing air and chewing food. It is also the vessel through which you smile, speak, and connect with others, which makes it an incredibly important part of honoring yourself, your intimate life experiences, and your health. So it is important to be mindful of these factors.

  • Make sure that the beauty of your teeth and mouth is in balance with the beauty of your mind and your spiritual well-being.
  • Take a moment to look in the mirror and smile wide. Acknowledge that this magnificent mouth of yours has been on this journey with you your entire life.
  • Look up a respected dentist in your area, and give that beautiful mouth of yours the attention it deserves, especially if your teeth are presently yellow, stained, overly crooked, or missing. And if it’s been a while since you’ve had a thorough cleaning and checkup (over six months), now is the time do this.
  • Take this weekend to practice and process what you have learned during this past week’s homework, as you build your Love House. Share in the Journal & Notes section, any triggers, and/or new found awareness that may have come up for you, and most importantly, how you choose to apply this new understanding to your life and to others, starting with yourself and your relationship with Jesus.